Blueprints on Worksheets

OK, I'm not, for one moment, say that this business is illegal. By all means, it is highly legitimate, and recommendable for some. The other night, I got an invite to a certain "business partnership" by a close friend. To be honest, I wasn't really interested since I'm already very swamped with what I do daily that I'm not interested in adding up some more. But since it was a close friend who asked, I respectfully agreed to meet her to talk about the "business proposal". Maybe, I thought, it would be nice to do something out of routine for that day. That day, 2 days after I got the invitation, we met up at a convenience store where, upon arrival, I was told we were going someplace else for the actual meeting for that "business proposal". I got a bit disoriented and before I knew it, I was in a packed seminar room with people apparently also invited for the "business partnership". To cut the story short, I listened to more than 2...

 Recently, we've been visiting showrooms in manila, checking out new cars without actually any intention of buying. It's a family(i.e. my brother, my father, and I) thing that we round showrooms from high end to local car dealers to tease our eyes and try what nice cars we could dream of accommodating in our garage. On mother's day, we visited a Porsche dealer since my dad got interested with this silver one and he wanted my mom to take a look at it. Just to look at it. If I'm honest, I had my fingers crossed hoping the slightest of possibilities that he would buy this one. Realistically enough, with what my parents earn and with all our expenses, all we could afford is a Japanese econobox on a car loan so no, my hopes were too high. But then again, we really weren't looking to buy any  that day so, moving on...  There was this one car I totally fell in love with: a Lexus GS. Among the cars I saw that day, this was actually the least attractive. But t...

You know what the worst part is? I'm in that position where I can't talk. And even if I can, I won't. Doing so would drag me deeper into this, deeper than I want to. And while I haven't talked, the paranoia of the repercussions of silence is slowly chewing through my mind. It's torture knowing what is at stake by this childish fiasco. I refuse to get dragged into this, so I refuse to speak. And if you know better, do stop putting me in the middle.

This is not really about the girl who tore my heart to pieces, though that could have been an equally interesting story as it is boring. It started with my professor recalling advising me during my enrollment regarding one of my subjects which shouldn't have been credited. That was the enrollment for my first semester in this university. After his recollection, he started asking me different questions, confirming that I transferred from this certain university, and asking me how and why it happened, among others. For almost 7 months now, this was the first time I got to talk with much gusto in any of my classes. What's more, it's the first time I got to talk to anyone about this. I told my story without feeling remorseful as I've carried this feeling for more than a year now and I think I've already moved on. Then the questions "What's it like there?" and "How is it different from here?" came up. I tried to stick with how academics was there ...

On a bipolar, over-thinking, 4-rules-for-a-happy-life-breaking note, I have to applaud you for having made me wait for so long, expect for nothing, assume the improbable, wait for something in return. With that, I'm gracious. Let me wait some more.

Once again, I evaded what could have been a kettle of vultures circling over my answers in a chemistry exercise; and possibly evaded making some new superficial friendships too. Or could I have once again missed the chance to make new friends? The other week, I discreetly tried to drive my classmates away when, while answering laboratory exercises, one told me to let him copy. While he was whispering this to me, other classmates started gathering behind me and looking over my paper. I immediately told him that I don't let others copy my work but I'd be willing to teach him how it's done. Only 2 classmates attempted to ask me to teach them and the others crowded those who shared answers and the others left scavenging for answers. This afternoon, I was confronted with a similar situation. After our exam in chemistry, we were asked to answer another set of exercises on our lab manuals. I finished the exam early so I had the chance to do the exercise early. Soon, people sta...

This welcomed my Christmas Season. Last Thursday, as was required in one of my subjects, we had a fieldwork somewhere in Tarlac. We were supposed to look for a rough, unpaved road, and survey it. We chose this road in the middle of rice fields at Tarlac since it was close enough to what the subject required. Anyway, though last week was a rain riddled week, Thursday had an energetic sun beaming brightly; so for our survey, we had to work under its heat, and over the muddy road. We didn't last long under the heat and when noon approached, we searched for a shade where we can rest and have lunch. We passed by this small  sari-sari store  which had concrete benches and a nice shade. The store stood in front of a rice field and a small, unfinished house. One of my classmates politely asked the tindero if we could stay in front of the store to eat. The guy invitingly directed us to a nipa hut behind the store and said we could use that since it had a table, which was actually a ...